Tuesday, 2 April 2013

Great Funny Quotes About Life Love Birthday Sayings Pictures

Great Funny Quotes Biography
You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake ― Bob Hope
Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience ― Mark Twain
My advice to you is to get married. If you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not you'll become a philosopher ― Socrates, Greek philosopher
I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her. ― Rodney Dangerfield
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man ― Lana Turner
The only time a woman can really succeed in changing a man is when he is a baby ― Natalie Wood
There are 3 kinds of people in the world…those who can count and those who can’t. ― FunnySaying
Now I started remembering why I dont remember anything! ― Homer Simpson
Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair ― Sam Ewing
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience. ― Oscar Wilde
A man never knows how to say goodbye; a woman never knows when to say it ― Helen Rowland
The first time I sang in the church choir, two hundred people changed their religion. ― Fred Allen
Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an automobile ― Billy Sunday
The old believe everything; the middle-aged suspect everything; the young know everything ― Oscar Wilde
The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think. ― Funny Saying
If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull side ― FunnySaying
Age is a question of mind over matter. If you don't mind, age don't matter ― Funny Saying
Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted ― FunnySaying
My wife and I were happy for 20 years - then we met. ― Rodney Dangerfield
Kids are like farts. You don’t mind your own, but other peoples are unbearable. ― FunnySaying
Men are like bank accounts. The more money, the more interest they generate. ― Mark Twain
The only thing worse than hearing the alarm clock in the morning is not hearing it. ― FunnySaying
My mind wanders a lot, but fortunately it's too weak to go very far. ― Bob Thaves
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell and have you actually looking forward to the trip. ― FunnySaying
Inside every older person is a younger person … wondering what the hell happened ― Cora Harvey Armstrong
Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. (Then when you do criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes) ―
“My father was stupid. He worked in a bank and they caught him stealing pens” ― Rodney Dangerfield
“Rarely is the question asked: is our children learning” ― George W. Bush
“Experience is like a comb that life gives you when you are bald” ― Navjot Singh Sidhu
“I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own” ― Les Dawson
“It is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man” ― H. L. Mencken
“My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She's ninety-seven now, and we don't know where the hell she is” ― Ellen DeGeneres
“When my old man wanted sex, my mother would show him a picture of me” ― Rodney Dangerfield
Great Funny Quotes
Great Funny Quotes
Great Funny Quotes
Great Funny Quotes
Great Funny Quotes
Great Funny Quotes
Great Funny Quotes
Great Funny Quotes
Great Funny Quotes
Great Funny Quotes
Great Funny Quotes
Great Funny Quotes
Great Funny Quotes
Great Funny Quotes
Great Funny Quotes

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