Sunday, 14 April 2013

Funny Quotes About Women About Life Love Birthday Sayings Pictures

Funny Quotes About Women Biography
Women are interesting creatures, but the things that people can say about them can make us seem almost alien. Below are some of my all time favorite quotes, some of which may seem made up but are oh so true. I hope to enjoy them!
Women like silent men. They think they're listening. ~Marcel Achard, Quote, 4 November 1956
Sure God created man before woman. But then you always make a rough draft before the final masterpiece. ~Author Unknown
Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them. ~Bill Maher
Every girl should use what Mother Nature gave her before Father Time takes it away. ~Laurence J. Peter
A woman can say more in a sigh than a man can say in a sermon. ~Arnold Haultain
Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult. ~Charlotte Whitton
Women are always beautiful. ~Ville Valo
The two women exchanged the kind of glance women use when no knife is handy. ~Ellery Queen
Curve: The loveliest distance between two points. ~Mae West
Can you imagine a world without men? No crime and lots of happy fat women. ~Nicole Hollander
Women get the last word in every argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument. ~Author Unknown
Next to the wound, what women make best is the bandage. ~Jules Barbey d'Aurevilly
A pessimist is a man who thinks all women are bad. An optimist is a man who hopes they are. ~Chauncey Mitchell Depew
The rarest thing in the world is a woman who is pleased with photographs of herself. ~Elizabeth Metcalf
There is a special place in hell for women who do not help other women. ~Madeleine K. Albright
A man's face is his autobiography. A woman's face is her work of fiction. ~Oscar Wilde
Women really do rule the world. They just haven't figured it out yet. When they do, and they will, we're all in big big trouble. ~"Doctor Leon,"
Ah, women. They make the highs higher and the lows more frequent. ~Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche
Every woman is wrong until she cries, and then she is right - instantly. ~Sam Slick (Thomas Chandler Haliburton)
When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. Women go right on cooking. ~Gail Sheehy
They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken. ~Author Unknown
If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning. ~Aristotle Onassis
Men will always delight in a woman whose voice is lined with velvet. ~Brendan Francis
I married beneath me - all women do. ~Nancy Astor, speech, Oldham, England, 1951
Women dress alike all over the world: they dress to be annoying to other women. ~Elsa Schiaparelli
Women are never stronger than when they arm themselves with their weakness. ~Marie de Vichy-Chamrond, Marquise du Deffand, Letters to Voltaire
All women are basically in competition with each other for a handful of eligible men. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
A woman should soften but not weaken a man. ~Sigmund Freud
A woman wears her tears like jewelry. ~Author Unknown
I prefer the word homemaker, because housewife always implies that there may be a wife someplace else. ~Bella Abzug
Women polish the silver and water the plants and wait to be really needed. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960
There are women who do not like to cause suffering to many men at a time, and who prefer to concentrate on one man: These are the faithful women. ~Alfred Capus
Men enjoy being thought of as hunters, but are generally too lazy to hunt. Women, on the other hand, love to hunt, but would rather nobody knew it. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
A man gives many question marks, however, a woman is a whole mystery. ~Diana Stürm
In passing, also, I would like to say that the first time Adam had a chance he laid the blame on woman. ~Nancy Astor, My Two Countries
God did it on purpose so that we may love you men instead of laughing at you. ~Mrs Patrick Campbell, in reply to a male acquaintance who asked why women seem to have no sense of humor
Men at most differ as Heaven and Earth, but women, worst and best, as Heaven and Hell. ~Alfred Lord Tennyson
The chief excitement in a woman's life is spotting women who are fatter than she is. ~Helen Rowland
I would rather trust a woman's instinct than a man's reason. ~Stanley Baldwin
Women do not find it difficult nowadays to behave like men, but they often find it extremely difficult to behave like gentlemen. ~Compton Mackenzie, Literature in My Time, 1933
After about 20 years of marriage, I'm finally starting to scratch the surface of that one. And I think the answer lies somewhere between conversation and chocolate. ~Mel Gibson, about what women want
You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she's pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment. ~Dave Barry, "Things That It Took Me 50 Years to Learn"
Women are afraid of mice and of murder, and of very little in between. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
Women who feel naked without their lipstick are well over thirty. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
A husband only worries about a particular Other Man; a wife distrusts her whole species. ~Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966
Do you not know I am a woman? when I think, I must speak. ~William Shakespeare, As You Like It
To get to a woman's heart, a man must first use his own. ~Mike Dobbertin, quoted in A 5th Portion of Chicken Soup for the Soul
Women speak two languages - one of which is verbal. ~William Shakespeare
Women are wiser than men because they know less and understand more. ~James Thurber
I hate women because they always know where things are. ~Voltaire
Fighting is essentially a masculine idea; a woman's weapon is her tongue. ~Hermione Gingold
The people I'm furious with are the women's liberationists. They keep getting up on soapboxes and proclaiming women are brighter than men. That's true, but it should be kept quiet or it ruins the whole racket. ~Anita Loos, New York Times, 10 February 1974
Women always worry about the things that men forget; men always worry about the things women remember. ~Author Unknown
No matter how happily a woman may be married, it always pleases her to discover that there is a nice man who wishes that she were not. ~H.L. Mencken
I hope that you all enjoyed these funny, interesting and incredibly true quotes about women!
Funny Quotes About Women
Funny Quotes About Women
Funny Quotes About Women
Funny Quotes About Women
Funny Quotes About Women
Funny Quotes About Women
Funny Quotes About Women
Funny Quotes About Women
Funny Quotes About Women
Funny Quotes About Women
Funny Quotes About Women
Funny Quotes About Women
Funny Quotes About Women
Funny Quotes About Women
Funny Quotes About Women

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