Funny Inspirational Quotes Biography
Quotes for training, personal development, and inspiration. Quotes provide helpful references and inspirational examples for business and life.
These quotes below here are mainly funny as well as inspirational and motivational.
Now moved to its own page, see the more serious collection of inspirational and motivational quotes for leadership, training, personal visualization, etc.
Below remain some other famous quotes, funny maxims and sayings, also love quotes for writing and speeches, fun and amusement.
Here are training cliches, maxims and sayings.
Many of the quotations here are good training aids. Quotes help convey complex issues, and can be very memorable and attitude-changing.
Some quotes are deep and meaningful; others deeply amusing, like the alleged quotes from letters to the council.
While sources are checked and clarified wherever possible, authenticity for all quotes cannot be guaranteed - these quotes are not meant to be a historical archive, they're here because they are motivational, inspirational, amusing or otherwise helpful for teachers, learners, leaders and communicators.
If you know the source of any of the unattributed quotes or sayings here please let me know so that acknowledgement can be given.
Inspirational quotes for leadership and personal development are now here.
See also the amusing real funny insurance claims, real funny Weakest Link answers, real funny Family Fortunes answers, and stories and metaphors for training and learning.
Included in this quotes page are several principles and 'laws' which are helpful in business, management, teaching and training, for example:
Parkinson's Triviality Law - also known as the Bikeshed Colour effect
The Peter Principle
The Pareto Principle (Pareto's Law, or the 80/20 Rule)
The 1st Law of Cybernetics (the Law of Requisite Variety)
Glass Half-Full or Half-Empty (have your say.. main collection now on the Glass Half-Full/Empty Quotes page)
Generations X, Y, Baby Boomers, etc
See the (now moved) collection of more serious inspirational and motivational quotes.
Please note that where quotations refer to 'man' or 'men' this is not intended to be discriminatory.
Send your favourite quote, funny saying, funny sign, funny graffiti, training maxims, or inspirational metaphors.
funny paternity explanations - (allegedly) from Child Support Agency (CSA) forms
These comments (allegedly) were provided by mothers on CSA forms in response to the CSA request for details of children's fathers. Aside from being variously amusing and sad their own right some of these quotes illustrate the admirable spirit and humour that people can exhibit in the face of personal challenge, institutional bureaucracy and what some clearly regard as an invasion of privacy.
"..I don't know the identity of the father of my daughter. He drives a BMW that now has a hole made by my stiletto in one of the door panels. Perhaps you can contact the BMW dealers in the area to see if he's had it replaced.."
"..I have never had sex with a man. I am waiting for a letter from the Pope confirming that my son's conception was immaculate, and that he is Christ risen again.."
"..[XXX] is the father of child A. If you catch up with him can you ask him what he did with my AC/DC CD's?.."
"..I don't know the name of my child's father as all squaddies look the same to me, although I can confirm he was a Royal Green Jacket.."
"..I thought it was [XXX] because we definitely had sex at a time which fits with the birth of child A, but since discovering he is gay I am not so sure.."
"..Regarding the identity of the father of my twins, child A was fathered by [XXX]. I am unsure about child B but I believe he was conceived on the same night.."
"..It's difficult to remember because I was drunk on holiday in Tenerife, which was months before I got properly pregnant.."