Daily Funny Quotes Biography
If you watch a clown show, you realize that the clown enacts scenes from daily life and puts them in a funny perspective. Humor is a balm that soothes the pain of a tragedy and makes it look like a comedy. If you want to adopt a sense of humor, begin by laughing at yourself. Here are some funny quotes to live by.
In life, it's not who you know that's important, it's how your wife found out.
My advice to those who are about to begin, in earnest, the journey of life, is to take their heart in one hand and a club in the other.
Life is like playing a violin in public and learning the instrument as one goes on.
Do not take life too seriously; you will never get out of it alive.
The day after tomorrow is the third day of the rest of your life.
All my life I've wanted, just once, to say something clever without losing my train of thought.
Life is painful, nasty and short... in my case it has only been painful and nasty.
The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.
If you want something said, ask a man; if you want something done, ask a woman.
I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.
"Laughter is the shortest distance between two people." -Victor Borge
"Laughter is an instant vacation." -Milton Berle
“The difference between genius and stupidity is; genius has its limits.” -Albert Einstein
“A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's. She changes it more often” -Oliver Herford
Life is like a ten-speed bicycle. Most of us have gears we never use.- Charles Schulz
You are getting old when you enjoy remembering things more than doing them. –Unknown
“When you are courting a nice girl an hour seems like a second. When you sit on a red-hot cinder a second seems like an hour. That's relativity.” -Albert Einstein
Life is not about how fast you run, or how high you climb, but how well you bounce.- Unknown
“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.” -Zig Ziglar
“I’m 59 and people call me middle aged. How many 118 year old men do you know?” -Barry Cryer
“Man has will… but woman has her way.” –Unknown
“You grow up the day you have your first real laugh - at yourself.”- Ethel Barrymore
Five out of four people have trouble with fractions.- Unknown
“Remember, today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.” - Dale Carnegie